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Tails wants to give a warning: This Article Contains Spoilers -
WARNING: This article contains major spoilers. If you do not wish to know vital information on plot / character elements in a story, you may not wish to read beyond this warning: We hold no responsibility for any negative effects these facts may have on your enjoyment of said media should you continue. That is all. |
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This article's content is marked as Mature Needlemouse found something very brutal for those with a weak heart. The page Lawyer Kong contains mature content that may include coarse language, sexual references, and/or graphic images which may be disturbing to some. Mature pages are recommended for those who are 18 years of age and older. If you're 18 years or older or are comfortable with graphic material, you are free to view this page. Otherwise, you should close this page and view another page. |
| “ | Lawyer Kong: Before HE joined all those years ago... things in Nintendo Land used to be normal. The day SMG4 arrived, everything changed. He spread his memes like a disease across the Mushroom Kingdom and everyone became stupid. SMG4: I just wanted to make videos... Lawyer Kong: So now, I've gotten permission from Nintendo to make this massive wall to keep all the non-Nintendo trash out! And better yet, everyone on this side of wall will go back to their normal selves! |
„ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong to SMG4, Meggy, Mario and Luigi in "SMG4: Mario Can't Play With You Anymore..." |
| “ | It's over. | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong’s infamous quote after getting Miyamoto to sign the DMCA. |
| “ | ♫HOLD IT! Don’t give me your lecture! Your argument here is pure conjecture! The defendants are vile and no doubt insane! They’re small leeches who’ll bring a world of pain!♫ |
„ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong’s first lines in the WOTFI 2022 rap battle. |
Funky Kong, also known as Lawyer Kong, is a major antagonist in the Australian adult-animated comedy web series SMG4, serving as major antagonist in the Modern Era, specifically as a minor character in Seasons 7 to 11, one of the two main antagonists (alongside Niles) of Season 12, and the main antagonist of The Lawsuit Arc.
He's also a cameo antagonist in the 2021 spin-off SMG4 Crew.
He is the corrupt lawyer working on behalf of a stricter and progressively more draconian Nintendo Headquarters, aiming to kick SMG4 and all of the series' influence and aspects out in order to restore the SMG4verse's iteration of Mushroom Kingdom to its original status as Nintendo's Mushroom Kingdom. He is the former second archenemy of Mario.
Biography[]
Lawyer Kong debuts in the video "SMG4 Gets Sued", where he leads his legal team to get Mario back to making games for Nintendo. When Mario refuses, he shows him the IP contract proving that he's Miyamoto's property, and before Mario can run away, Lawyer Kong and his legal team subdue him and leave the castle. However, Meggy saves Mario from Nintendo again, and Lawyer Kong holds SMG4 hostage with a DMCA paper to make Mario return. In the end, as Miyamoto decided to make a new game with Luigi, Lawyer Kong reluctantly lets Mario go, but states he will come back for him.
Later, Lawyer Kong got permission from Nintendo to make a firewall to separate the non-Nintendo characters from the Mushroom Kingdom. Believing SMG4 and Meggy were "trash", Lawyer Kong shows that everyone on the Mushroom Kingdom side of the wall will soon go back to their original selves before leaving again.
After Meggy saves Mario in Inkopolis and causes a catastrophe in the city, Luigi starts cooking and selling memes, since it will turn everyone back to normal, but Lawyer Kong intervenes and imprisons them from furthering corruption of Mushroom Kingdom. At the prison, Lawyer Kong tries to convince Miyamoto to sign the Super DMCA, however, Mario and Luigi begged him to put them into making games. It only works for a little while, until Lawyer Kong had enough and made Miyamoto to sign the documents, while effortlessly shoving off Meggy's parody contract. Mario can only watch everyone around him perishes, while Meggy dies in his arms and SMG4 witnesses the inevitable fate of his channel.
SMG4 says his final goodbyes to Mario, recalling the good times in his life, before deleting his channel and perishing. Later on, Mario continues to be despondent and unable to cooperate with Nintendo. When he has a bathroom break, he suddenly finds some documents in his hat. When Phoenix Wright asks for toilet paper, Mario handed the documents to him, and was confused when Phoenix suddenly stated it would save his life. After the lawyer leaves the bathroom, Mario soon realizes it was Meggy's parody contract and that she hid it in his hat as she died.
Lawyer Kong starts to pursue Mario when he sneaks into the Nintendo HQ and tries to save his friends, but he eventually makes it to the Supreme Courthouse of Mushroom Kingdom. Lawyer Kong, in a fit of rage, attempts choking Mario to death, only for Judge Kirby to make an intervention. Kirby decides to rule in Mario's favor upon seeing the signed DMCA, despite Lawyer Kong's protests. Since the IP contract was invalid and the DMCA no longer forfeits the contract, it brings SMG4 and everyone back to life. As everyone was here for a trial against Nintendo, Lawyer Kong laughs at them since they don't have a lawyer until Meggy makes her entrance to the courthouse, much to SMG4 and Mario's excitement and Lawyer Kong's anger. As the Trial is about to begin, the monkey plans to do his indirect genocide again if he wins, and when he does, he will finally be able to shut SMG4's YouTube channel for good, even if it means it could potentially lead to the end of the SMG4verse.
The outcome of their trial has finally come in SMG4 episode "SMG4: War of the Fat Italians 2022." During the trial, he and Meggy argue whether Mario should be used for parody purposes or not, and Kirby decided that they should settle a trial with a war. After the war, SMG4's gang have a rap battle with Lawyer Kong, while presumably foreshadowing uncertain events, and end up winning the trial as the Super DMCA explodes into dust. with Lawyer Kong reverting back to his old personality, Funky Kong. Funky decides that since not even Nintendo believes in him, he should quit being a lawyer to dance to his funky music and sell guns instead and leaves, much to the heroes confusion.
Meanwhile, "Kirby" revealed himself to be Shigeru Miyamoto all along and admitted that he is the mastermind behind the trial, including hiring Funky Kong as his lawyer. The whole point of the trial was to see if SMG4 could be a threat to Nintendo, and thankfully he decides that the channel is cool and fun. SMG4 cheers, glad that Miyamoto likes him, but he has one condition: because SMG4 looks too similar to Mario, and to everyone's shock, he must change his IP design, or he will be forced to file a second DMCA.
SMG4 considers this and accepts, deciding that the privilege of staying in the Mushroom Kingdom with his friends is worth it. With the deal sealed, Miyamoto signs a permanent IP change contract and throws it at SMG4, transforming him into his new IP redesign. Everyone stares at SMG3, confused as to why he wasn't changed, and he shrugs this off but comically turns into his redesign as well, being similar but with a different color code and a beard. SMG3 notices this and panics. Meggy welcomes SMG4 to the permanent new body club. Mario asks if he feels alright, and SMG4 replies that he feels amazing as now he can create content freely without fear of getting sued.
In the end, Mario, SMG4 and Meggy are watching the sunset, glad that everything turned out fine and that now they never need to worry about Nintendo HQ suing them again. Unfortunately, Funky Kong appears before SMG4, Mario and Meggy, who prepare for a fight, only to offer the gang his weapons. And with that, everything in the mushroom Kingdom and the channel finally returns to normal, with a few new twists... for now.
Personality[]
As Funky Kong, he's comedic, dimwitted and likely charismatic (much like his mainstream counterpart), yet he's a deceitful weapons dealer who sells weapons and items to people and scams them.
Despite this, Funky Kong does love and care about his friends, especially Donkey Kong, and like being the latter's second-in-command of the DK crew.
As Lawyer Kong, he is ruthless, callous, oppressive and xenophobic towards any non-Nintendo character, especially the SMG4 Crew, wanting to destroy all of them.
Despite having some dimwitted moments, he's not completely dimwitted. In fact, he's shown to be extremely manipulative, managing to get all non-Nintendo characters killed by manipulating Shigeru Miyamoto to sign his contract.
Despite his callous and xenophobic behavior, he sometimes feels remorse for his actions, as shown in Mario Gets into NFTs after he saw Mario causing chaos and destruction in the Mushroom Kingdom, he tried to commit suicide out of regret for giving NFTs to Mario. He is also shown to be slightly honorable when he allows SMG4 to say his final goodbye to Mario just before he temporarily dies.
Quotes[]
| “ | This isn't the last you've seen of me. | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong vowing vegeance foreshadowing the events of lawsuit arc. |
| “ | Luigi you forgot one thing...YOUR MOM! | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong managing to defeat Luigi by insulting his mom. |
| “ | Lawyer Kong: Mario how do you think this will end. Mario: it will end with Mario getting his friends back, YOU BIG MONKEY! |
„ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong confronting Mario. |
| “ | HE HAS NO STYLE HE HAS NO GRACE THIS KONG HAS A GUN | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong attempting to shoot Mario. |
| “ | YOU ARE LEGALLY DEAD!! | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong's villainous breakdown as he violently attempts to strangle Mario to death. |
| “ | But we signed a binding contract. | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong after noticing that Kirby is going to start the trial. |
| “ | Wait no! YOU CAN'T POSSIBLY AGREE! These three don't even have a degree! | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong's final line in the WOTFI 2022 rap as he realizes he's about to lose. |
| “ | Screw this! Whats the point of being a Nintendo Lawyer if Nintendo doesn't even believe in me!!! (Turn back to Funky Kong) I'm gonna go and dance to funky music and sell weapons instead. | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong after being defeated by SMG4's Gang. |
| “ | I smell a DMCA! | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong attempted to sue Mario for copying off Sonic |
Gallery[]
Images[]
Videos[]
Trivia[]
- He seems to be inspired from O'Brien, the main antagonist from George Orwell's British dystopian science fiction novel 1984, And Manfred Von Karma, the main antagonist of the visual novel Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney.
- He's the third villain to be against SMG4 and his channel, the first being SMG3 who used to want to copy or steal SMG4's content, and Susan Wojcicki, who demonetized SMG4's videos. However, Lawyer Kong would need the help of his employer, Shigeru Miyamoto, to have it terminated.
- This portrayal of the character is meant to be a jab at how protective Nintendo has been over their IPs and how they harshly eliminate any of their source material from fanmade projects.
- Lawyer Kong's voice comes from Uberduck.ai, a text to speech website that used to replicate voices of fictional characters until mid-2023..
External Links[]
- Lawyer Kong on the SMG4 Wiki
- Lawyer Kong on the Inconsistently Heinous Wiki
